F 'thigh gaps' and all the power and attention society gives in thinking having one means something bigger than not. Does it mean you're prettier? You're more likable? More successful? I now know the answer is NO but ask me that, hmm maybe even last year, I would have said, well...yea!
I was having one of "those days" earlier and saw nothing but thick, TOO thick, of legs in every reflection I saw of myself while running around, when in my mind I wish I was really "running" thinking some miles would make them automatically thinner and in turn, would meannnnn, I'm cool?
🤔This was completely ruining and controlling my mood and mind the entire day until I stopped and took a second to breathe and think of the bigger picture here before completely going 1000 steps backwards in recovery.
I walked in a bathroom, luckily just me, and stood and stared at myself saying "what the hell am I doing?" I have completely tortured myself every second of the day thinking the size of my thighs dictate who I am and how ppl view me. It's basically like having a Drill Sargent in your head yelling nothing but body shaming comments and your mind believing it, yet, still trying to act like nothing is wrong and go about your day. I tried to take control back and think of my legs as JUST that, Legs. I should appreciate and embrace the more athletic-built legs that I was born with and that has allowed me to function in life. I should not be torturing and judging myself in trying to mold my legs into little twigs or whatever my mind deems to be perfect. I mean, what would that accomplish? Having more friends? More social acceptance? No fears? No. The size of my legs has nothing to do with who I am as a person. They allow me to walk, run, climb, swim, sit, each and every day. They are LEGS! So this is me, taking a step forward (pun intended), in accepting my legs as they are and not what my subconscious mind feels is acceptable. If it just takes one body part at a time to start respecting and liking my body, so be it. I woooould be kind of lost without it.
TLC
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